Saturday, January 31, 2009

Show Me

After a disheartening occurrence a week ago Friday, I knew I had to turn to the Lord right in the midst of the pain and the race of my heart. I didn't have my Bible in the car. I had to keep my mind on God. I prayed. I looked at my dashboard where I knew I had scripture. My scripture strips as I've referenced and invented them. I meditated on the top one. Psalm 25:4. Little did I know it wasn't the last time God would show this to me. I opened my email on that Friday night and read one of my daily devotionals. Would you know that the very first line I read was this verse. The title of the devotional being "The Lord Will Guide Your Steps!" You can imagine the awe. The thankfulness for this verse. The gratefulness for God speaking to me in this verse. The devotional continued with some verses very familiar to me. I am always amazed with one of "my" verses are written in something.

Show me your ways, O LORD, teach me your paths; guide me in your truth and teach me, for you are God my Savior, and my hope is in you all day long. He guides the humble in what is right and teaches them his way. All the ways of the LORD are loving and faithful for those who keep the demands of his covenant. For the sake of your name, O LORD, forgive my iniquity, though it is great. Who, then, is the man that fears the LORD? He will instruct him in the way chosen for him. He will spend his days in prosperity, and his descendants will inherit the land. Psalm 25:4-5,9-13

Do you need guidance and directions from the Lord in what you need to do? This was the start of the paragraph in the devotional I received. Well, yeah. Of course I do, do you not know my heart and life? I thought.

In this past week, it seems the heaviness has continued. This week of hibernation, because of the snow storm and not working four days, has not helped the heaviness weighing on my discouraged heart. I've thanked the Lord countless times for the electricity maintained in my home. I can't imagine enduring this week in silence, without connection to friends through the web, and with the ability to escape my life via movies and television. I thank the Lord that I was ever so blessed by a friend clearing my driveway. No, he did not shovel my drive. Indeed, he brought his tractor and scooped away the feet and feet of snow. The Lord reminds me of this blessing each time my eyes lay on the huge piles of snow at the end of my drive. Who would've ever seen such beauty in big dirty piles of snow. Just a piece of evidence of His presence. What a warmth to my heart to "see" His assurance of me not being alone even in this week of hibernation, a snow storm, and a heavy heart.

I've cried out to the Father many, many times this week. JUST show me...SHOW me Your ways...SHOW me what to do...SHOW me what to think...SHOW me what to believe in my circumstances. I asked yesterday that He just give me one sign...a sign of what is to come...a sign of what He is doing...a sign of what direction my life lays. Anything. It seems the issues of the heart can be so trying and take a toll on our spirit. It's not a matter of: Should I take this job? Should I sell my car? Should I take a second job? Should I relocate? Should I go back to school? Though, those are all very important matters and could be matters in many lives. It seems I take my issue so seriously and so intently because it is so close to my heart and it is my heart. It is about love, life, forgiveness, partnership, forever, marriage, devotion, commitment, vows, covenant.

It is not a matter of trust...trusting God. It is a matter of pain and longing. How does one put a cap on that? How does one close the door to that? How does one make it less important? How does one let go?

I apologize if this is vague. But it is so, for many reasons. One is that the more vague, the more lightly it may touch one of you and light something in your own heart. Though I try as I might to stick to my mission of this blog, at times, I believe God calls me to share more personally in hopes to accomplish many things. Maybe...healing in my heart, enlightenment in your heart as well as my own heart, encouraging one another, hoping my story of pain will help another share their story. The possibilities are wide when we open our hearts for God to speak to us and through us.

All in all, it is my hope that every post will touch you in some way to
enrich your life, strengthen your walk, encourage your heart, or enlighten your mind.

Here are the other scriptures that were in that devotionals. All ones that were either etched on my heart or familiar to me. All verses that were soothing to my soul. May one of them speak to you and sooth your soul, warm your heart, or ease your mind.

In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. Proverbs 16:9

Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know. Jeremiah 33:3

Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, "This is the way; walk in it." Isaiah 30:21

For this God is our God forever and ever; he will be our guide even to the end. Psalm 48:14

I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you. Psalm 32:8

Show Me Lord, Show Me.

18 comments:

Beth in NC said...

Dear Paula, Obviously I don't know what is weighing so heavy on your heart, but your Father does. I am praying that you will feel God's peace and direction.

I am so thankful you didn't lose power and that a friend came to clear your drive!

God bless you!
Beth

Anonymous said...

Paula.. I have been walking in a fog of discouragement and disappointment this week... The truth is SATAN was having a field day....Only by rebuking him, can I run back into the LORD's presense, where it is safe, and he is there to meet all our needs...Our GOD never leaves us, but we sure find ways of leaving him.... Blessings my dear sister in Christ.. I will be praying for you. kathy

Melanie said...

In his heart a man plans his course, but the LORD determines his steps. Proverbs 16:9

This verse you shared is one that I have read more than once over the last few weeks. What a great reminder to us all that we turn it over to God for only He knows the steps we should take to lead us where we should go.

Praying for you!

CathM said...

Paula, be encouraged...

“Earth has no sorrow that Heaven cannot heal” (Author Unknown).

“He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 146:3).

Paula said...

Thank you so much Paula. I needed to read this tonight, as I need to rely on Him more for the direction I am to take regarding one area of my life. I am held back by matters from the past and need to overcome the fear they bring. As I know your story, my thoughts and prayers are with you, as I feel your pain. He will guide you and He will show you, but in His time. Love ya, Paula

Pam said...

Dear Paula, as you cry out to Him, and you are not crying alone, I KNOW HE will answer you. I know He is making your path clear. And I know that many times that is only enough light for the next step. Sometimes He doesn't give us a clear picture of what the end will look like. (I am thinking MOST of the time HE doesn't) TODAY we will walk in obedience to HIM. Today we will cry out to HIM for direction and HE will GIVE us direction for TODAY. Joining you in prayer, dear sister.

elaine @ peace for the journey said...

Paula:
I'm at a place of really needing specific guidance from the Lord in a couple of matters. I am continually in prayerful pause before him, seeking his face and his peace about the wise way to proceed.

Thanks for your continuing trust in our Lord. Your words of "searching" have helped me in my own today.

By the way, love the new look of your blog. The pictures continue to be a stunning representative of our Father's creative genius!

peace~elaine

Tonja said...

May God give you peace and understanding as you wait on Him for answers. Remember, His timing is perfect.

God bless you.

Laura said...

I love how you seek Him, how you pause to hear His voice. Praying His comfort over you, dear friend.

Gail W. said...

Paula, I have walked where you are so many times. When I start to question what kind of faith do I really have, that I could feel so down? All lies from Satan. Your web site is such a smorgasboard of encouragement - I LOVE all the snippets of faith and belief in so many quotes. God is with you, dear sister, and you are in our prayers.

Pat said...

I love your words Paula. You are always so real and transparent and your ministry evident. God uses you in powerful ways to craft His word and encourage others.
Stay the course!
Pat

Abba's Girl said...

Lord I thank you for Paula and her godly posts, her loving heart, and her love for You. I ask You to pour out Your comfort on her. Give her Your Wisdom. I pray You give her a glimpse of the good plans You have for her in the future. Lord, I pray there is love and forgiveness all around in the situations of her life between all people involved, I pray there is dying to self as well. Lord, protect her from all attacks of the enemy. Please refresh her mentally, spiritually, and physically. Thank You that she turns to You and Your precious Word. In Jesus' Name I pray.

Sharon said...

Waiting on his answer for your questions are hard and timely, and our hearts ache for his Love, but we have to continue to have faith. I am praying for you always
Love & blessings

LynnSC said...

OH Paula, your heart is so precious to me and to the Father. I am sorry for the heaviness that you are feeling... but you are going to the right source to heal it. Keep searching His face... and trusting His plan.

What a blessing for someone to come and remove the snow from your driveway... and for your power to stay on... what sweet reminders from the Father that His eyes are on you.

Blessings,
Lynn

JnL4God said...

Hi my friend,
Are you doing okay? I will go check my e-mail. I think I know what may be going on I love you and God will get you through this. Big hug from me.
Lynn

Carol said...

My dear friend,

You have been on my heart so this entie weekend. It started as I watched Fireproof again Friday night, but a song that plays in it about waiting on God.

All I could think about was you, it reminded me of how you wait, and worship.

I dedicated it to you on my blog today. I love you friend.

Love and hugs,
Carol

valerie said...

It's so nice to have a face to go with the blog I've been reading and corresponding to over the past year.
Yay!
Hang in there, Sister! We all love you and keep you in our prayers. Stay in the Word!
Love,
Valerie

Kristen said...

Paula...

I have been praying for you this week. Praying that as you cry out to our Father that you find comfort in His love and to hear His answers... to love the dreams He has dreamed for you. May you be free of the chains that burden your heart. Break free - move forward, taste and see that the Lord is good!

I also have to tell you how delighted I was to see your face on your blog! You my friend, are beautiful!

Love you,
~K